ashley's blog

M83 in London

2011-12-01T23:00:00.001-08:00

This track gets going about the 6 min mark...Very happy i got a ticket for the event

Piggyback for rols

2011-09-19T11:19:00.000-07:00

Only Roland would ask for piggyback so he would'nt get his feet wet!

Class of 808

2011-09-19T10:56:00.001-07:00

For those who know the difference

2011-07-12T02:12:00.000-07:00

Private View

2011-07-12T02:02:00.000-07:00

Motobike Parking in Chelsea

2011-07-12T02:00:00.000-07:00

Try as you might motobike parking in Chelsea is a joke, two tier system one empty the other full as all the residents park in the free parking.

Shooting Club 50m

2011-06-19T13:36:00.001-07:00

Plane.

2010-09-13T14:02:00.000-07:00

LaserLove...

2010-09-13T13:56:00.000-07:00

Yes! Release the lasers...

illuminievent, Shoreditch.

2010-09-13T13:32:00.000-07:00

http://www.illuminievent.co.uk/illumini-2010/illumini-2010-main.html

Gourmet Hotdogs

2010-09-13T13:09:00.000-07:00

gour·met

A connoisseur of fine food and drink.

NewSpeak.Saatchi Gallery

2010-09-13T11:03:00.000-07:00

Food for Thought

2010-09-13T10:25:00.000-07:00

I'm the sound man for this film. Food for Thought indeed.

Photography is strictly prohibited

2010-09-07T03:10:00.000-07:00

Chelsea and Kensington Motobike Parking Policy

2010-08-09T05:29:00.000-07:00

Fantastic two tier parking policy. If you are resident you can pay to park or
just park in the free visitor bays. Hmm, what would you do?

Abandoned dog seeks new home

2010-08-09T05:27:00.000-07:00

Controlled Zone

2010-08-09T05:25:00.000-07:00

Out of Africa - The Orphanage

2010-05-31T09:41:00.000-07:00

Out of Africa - Volta Region

2010-05-31T09:37:00.000-07:00

Out of Africa - Around Town

2010-05-31T09:32:00.000-07:00

Out of Africa - John Evans Atta Mills

2010-05-28T11:33:00.000-07:00

Out of Africa - Film Crew.

2010-05-28T11:14:00.000-07:00

Out of Africa - Supersonic Wave Bubbling Massage Bath

2010-05-28T11:06:00.000-07:00

This is going to be good eh?

Waitrose Runner Bean Airmiles - Ash to blame.

2010-04-22T11:13:00.000-07:00

Makes you think about all those airmiles on your runner beans.

The Sun Seeker

2010-04-19T10:50:00.000-07:00

Hamilton, finding that last drop of sunshine.

Incredible India - Adventures with the visa office.

2010-04-10T02:04:00.000-07:00

"Incredible India" as the adverts proclaim. My experience with the India embassy to procure my visa would have me saying those very words repeatedly.

"Get there early" Roland Advised.
"How early?" I enquired hesitantly.

"Early" he replied with a serious look.

7am and the queue was numbering a good seventy people. It was pitch dark, cold and windy. With one hour and thirty minutes till opening time. I settled in my book "American Shaolin" a loan from Richard.

As I waited I was alarmed to see a second line begin to form. It transpired this was for Indian passport holders only. Every once in a while a non Indian would join the queue only to be told the bad news. They would turn around and see the correct line now at this time snaking round the building. Inevitably their faces would drop as they started the long walk of shame to the back of the line.

Eventually the queue started to shuffle along, approaching the window I looked around for some basic instructions only to find a sheet of A4 sellotaped to the wall "Security notice. No bags shall be allowed on the embassy premises There is no provision for storage of any bags." At that moment I was next 'How many?' A voice asked behind the tiny counter. 'How many what?' 'Visa!' 'Ah I understand'. '1 please.' And with that I was issued a card with a number. Moving along to the main doors a man directed me upstairs. Passing through the unmanned metal detector with a reassuring beep. I was in. The no bags policy was thankfully ignored. In fact my local Tesco metro could lay on better security.

Being reasonable early I had managed to secure a front row seat to the ensuing chaos, shouting matches with official and applicant on various subjects as incomplete forms, not having cash to pay the visa fee (they don't accept cards) and my favourite catching out at least four people, multiple visa applications with only one ticket number.. Naturally all of this could be avoided by simple putting up some basic instructions. Taking this all in I glanced to the ticket counter showing approaching my number at that very moment the screen went blue and crashed. I looked to the heavens for intervention and thankfully moment latter order was restored and I was next. Apart from minor error of not writing the words "no' in the other passports box (i had put a line) my application was accepted. I was told to come back in hour as she vaguely pointed to a booth at the end of the counters. When I returned a small crowd has gathered round the booth and random numbers were being shouted out in no particular order I guess the the embassy's version of visa bingo. Finally my number was called and was given my passport back. Complete with visa and smugged green stamp. "Incredible India" indeed. It was 11am

It was midday when I touched down in Bombay. As we landed I could feel the heat radiating through the window. Visa control was uneventful and with a shake of the head I was in.

Walking out into the midday sun I could feel a wave of heat wash over me.
I had been advised that in order to get into town I should make use of the pre paid taxi service. Such was the state of the ramshackle office and signage I refused to believe that it could be anything remotely official and promptly walked past it into no mans land

Somebody eventually took pity on me and sent me back to the counter. I informed them of my destination and was asked if sir required a/c considering that sweat was now pouring off me i readily agreed and handed over my cash.

A few locals where loitering round trying to hold onto my baggage. While waiting for the various forms to be filled in I tried to establish whom the driver was. All responded with a confident yes. Eventually we started walking toward the cars with my entourage in tow. Chief holder of my receipt, senior baggage holder and his assistant. The receipt was handed over to whom I presumed would be my driver. He open the door for and then walked off. The baggage boys where hanging around waiting for a tip. Considering we had walked all of ten metres I dismissed both of them. They both sulked off. 5 minutes later sitting in my oven of a taxi a completely different man returned. Surely this was my driver? Thankfully yes and with that we were off.

Instinctively I reached for my seat belt only to find it was broken, glancing over to see if the driver had had bothered with his..he hadn't. Then we hit the highway and he put his on immediately.

I can understand why. Lane discipline is not a concept any respectable India is familiar with. Why only have two cars in both lanes when four will easily fit. A bus packed full of passengers passed on the inside narrowly avoiding crashing into the side of our car. The words "Safety is our motto" painted in large letters on it's side.

"A/C?" I enquired and with that he wound down the window.

Having arrived just about in one piece at the hotel, I dropped off my bags and headed down to the gateway of India.

A music concert seemed to be in full swing when I arrived. Unfortunately the music was being drowned out by the hive of workers currently trying to improve the surroundings. The official project title being "beautification of gateway" The sound of power-tools and the smog of dust being thrown up against the backdrop of the gateway really gave the concert something the India culture minster would be proud of.

As I sat down to enjoy the cacophony of noise some chap sat down next to me.

'Hello, what is your name?'

'Ashley'

'And yours?'

'Hitesh'

'Where are you from?'

'London'

'Ah yes, I went to Southhall in London, very nice.'

'Did you go anywhere else in London?'

'No, just Southall'

'And you, where you from?'

'Punjab, I visit Bombay'

'What is your job?'

'IT'

'And yours?'

'I study to become engineer.'

'Are you married?'

'Not yet.. sorry did you say you knew my mother?'

'Are you gay?'

'No'

'Are you a virgin?'

'No.'

'Very good'

And with that we exchanged numbers and agreed to meet for lunch the next day. it was very simple, two like minded individuals had struck a cord. What could possible go wrong?

Woof!

2010-04-09T05:35:00.000-07:00

Still No!

2010-04-09T05:32:00.000-07:00

A walk in the countryside

2010-04-09T05:19:00.000-07:00

2010-04-09T05:16:00.000-07:00

2010-04-09T05:15:00.000-07:00

Weds Morning Breakfast Club “Gathering”

2010-03-18T02:15:00.000-07:00

You spin me right round, baby
right round like a record, baby
Right round round round
You spin me right round, baby
Right round like a record, baby
Right round round round

http://www.notobikeparkingtax.com/

Breadshoes.

2010-03-17T03:18:00.000-07:00

Fuck Yes!

Picture Credit Restisnoise

Don;t want to make your own..Buy some...

The Wednesday Morning Breakfast Club

2010-03-12T03:30:00.000-08:00

Join us for breakfast on Wednesday, treat us like cars and we're congest like cars.

MF Doom, Roundhouse London. Taste of Sonar Review.

2010-03-06T07:05:00.000-08:00

The cries of Dooom were quickly turning into boos, it was 10.30 pm, the Hip hop legend MF doom was nowhere to be seen. He was expected at 10pm. Was he coming? 'He did this shit last time.' 'Played Amsterdam and Paris, so he's in Europe' another remarked. A few were wondering if they would manage to catch the last tube train home. I was. Although, the huge tour bus in the car park was a bit of a giveaway.

Eventually,around 11 ish the mad villains accordion started to blast out, and as the crowd surged with raised hands cocked pistol fashion, it had started. Doooom! The excitement levels had been raised only to be turned off moments later as the crowd had rumbled that it wasn't actually him. Boooo! Unless he had undergone dramatic weight loss it wasn't him. Levels up, back on stage and this time it was the Metal face man. He was here, having never played the UK. This was the real deal.

Let me check my people out, as Doom scanned the front row. Only to remark "mother fucking white people" Not the best way to start having kept his UK fan-base waiting.

Waving his British passport around on stage managed to prompt a few cheers, 'I'm home UK" the man declared. 'Yeah' said his hype man, who was generally annoying throughout whole performance by repeating the last sentence of each rhyme. Unnecessary.

Despite his reputation for playing short sets, the crowd where treated for their patience. Hoe Cakes my personal favorite made an appearance amongst others. Super. The sound system was a bit patchy, Doom had managed an appearance but his sound engineer obviously hadn't. He stuck with the classics and was thanked for it.

The bar staff were excellent, polite. Service with a smile, something Doom should learn. The security was a little bit lax, the smell of dope was evident throughout.

So overall, for £30 pounds for an 45 minute set. Not very good value for money. The promotors should of put on a few other acts instead of DJ sets nobody was interested in.

So was it worth it? Sure, it's MF Doom init.

Picture Credit. encosion

Warning! Contains Mustard.

2010-01-10T16:53:00.000-08:00

Tube Station Party

2009-12-28T11:30:00.000-08:00

Brixton.

Panasonic ag-hmc151e / 150 "Check card " error

2009-11-10T03:59:00.000-08:00

If you find your presented with a Check Card error is could well mean that you have a faulty card but if you like me have a card that is in fact class 6 and should work it could be because you have tried to format the card on your operating system (osx / Pc) and it overwritten the file system metadata on the card giving you a Unsupported card error in the Cameras Menu.

Generally, SD/SDHC Memory Card file systems formatted with generic operating system formatting software do not comply with the SD Memory Card specification.

The solution to this is to use Panasonic's SD Formatting Software to restore the meta data. So in future always use the Camera to format the card.

http://panasonic.jp/support/global/cs/sd/download/sd_formatter.html

Please leave a comment if this helped!

Why not buy your camera a larger memory card today from my website ?(shameless plug)

John Maus

2009-11-09T05:02:00.000-08:00

John Maus

Kitty | MySpace Video

Roland Gets wet.

2009-11-09T04:28:00.000-08:00

Just live your life.

2009-11-09T04:06:00.000-08:00

Filmed on my Camera on a night out in Camden

update for J. Lighthouse.

2009-08-27T17:41:00.000-07:00

Blinds

2009-07-28T13:39:00.000-07:00

My blinds

(test blog from my new HTC Hero)

Fete Champetre & Concours d'elegance 2009

2009-06-08T01:52:00.000-07:00

Belfast.

2009-06-08T01:30:00.000-07:00

Stripped to the Bone.

2009-06-08T01:21:00.000-07:00

If you know anything about bikes you will appreciate what's going on here. The headset has been removed as well as the bottom bracket.

NO to the Motobike Parking Tax! 11TH MAY 2009 demonstration

2009-05-31T14:38:00.000-07:00

I'm on the right hand side getting an eyeful of the filthy girl!

DEVO - Q: Are We Not Men? A: We Are Devo!

2009-05-11T02:32:00.000-07:00

Lobster fisherman or Devotee?

http://open.spotify.com/track/4fNbrazMYC1CbalcQ8YFGC

Frinton.

2009-04-30T11:51:00.000-07:00

Is that the AA? Will a £10 Halfords jack work on a two ton Rolls Royce?

Sparks - This Town Ain't Big Enough

2009-03-24T09:08:00.000-07:00

Poor Jon, as none of my friends wanted to go to this JB got dragged along (always a safe bet!), at the end of the clip you can see how happy he was to be there!

Cowdray Shooting Ground - Clay Pigeon

2009-03-08T09:17:00.000-07:00

The Hunter or should I say somebody wearing hunter boots. Click here for the general idea...

Barn's seen it all before.

Lingfield Racecourse

2009-03-01T13:01:00.000-08:00

I'll try my best.

Owner of a hoof.

http://www.lingfield-racecourse.co.uk/

Bikes - Funny looking Motobike!

2009-03-01T03:13:00.000-08:00

Snow Patrol

2009-02-03T05:53:00.000-08:00

Boat Show

2009-01-28T02:39:00.000-08:00

Stowaway found aboard HMS Motionless

Fashion Fix - Fashion Crimes Exposed!

2009-01-28T02:24:00.000-08:00

Ready for a night out in Vauxhall

JB's new role model approves the look.

Scotland 2008

2009-01-28T02:02:00.000-08:00

Rolands Birthday Treat! Big Easy Surf and Turf Deluxe

2009-01-22T03:46:00.000-08:00

Yes Rols, it's all for you!

Moo!

It came from the deep. The lobsters origins are unknown.

The Final Chip

Success! A new member of the 70oz club

70oz / 2 kilo Steak & Lobster Combo
Flame Roasted Double Thick Cut 28oz T-Bone, a Roasted 1 Kilo Lobster & 1/4lb Fries - Surf and Turf Deluxe

Christmas Drinks 2008

2008-12-15T02:23:00.000-08:00

Media Diary 2.

2008-12-01T11:42:00.000-08:00

The Man Who Fell to Earth (1976) Nicolas Roeg
On Any Sunday (1971) Bruce Brown
The Night James Brown Saved Boston (2008) David Leaf
Valseuses, Les (1974) Bertrand Blier

Media Diary 1.

2008-11-26T14:57:00.000-08:00

Stanley Kubricks Boxes - Jon Ronson

The Perfect Human - Jørgen Leth

A Sunday In Hell - Jørgen Leth

"Things sure haven't changed"

2008-11-09T08:41:00.000-08:00

Roland, should of stayed at home today.

2008-11-06T07:34:00.000-08:00

Fashion Fix

2008-10-31T10:20:00.000-07:00

Tour de Spain - Torqs Stag.

2008-07-12T05:43:00.000-07:00

The Matador, El Warren.

Puppy Show.

Ready for action.

Eric Banner.

Help! I've got something stuck to my head.

I'll give those Germans a run for their money

And then I told him, it only had one leg!

Crikey

Big Leanne from Wigan...Rest that pint girl, rest that pint.

Each button represents a state of drunkenness...You get the picture.

You want doll?

rhythm is a dancer

Let's have it fella!

A naughty but clean show

Sticky Vicky, goodness..some things you just can't unsee..

No spanish needed here.

Windows Watch - Cashpoint running NT 4.

2008-07-12T05:00:00.000-07:00

Put my card in only for the thing to shutdown!

Crimewatch - The Merc that didn’t make it..

2008-06-16T08:39:00.000-07:00

'Trooping the Colour' - Young Seb, the next David Bailey?

2008-06-16T06:00:00.000-07:00

Hmm, I don’t know Ash, gonna have to pop these babies into Photoshop and sort my alpha levels.

Toilet Humor - Jono's, pride of camberwell

2008-06-16T05:42:00.000-07:00

Motobike - 101 uses for an estate agent board

2008-06-12T07:55:00.000-07:00

Fete Champetre & Concours d'elegance

2008-06-12T07:40:00.000-07:00

Down Under - Adelaide - MotoART

2008-06-12T02:00:00.000-07:00

Down Under - Great Ocean Road

2008-05-22T15:15:00.000-07:00

Down Under - Rich and Donny

2008-05-12T18:37:00.000-07:00

The boys

I should know how this works...give me a minute

How large it that eh?

Photo! Photo!

Down Under - Sydney

2008-05-12T18:32:00.000-07:00

Down Under - Bondi

2008-05-08T20:47:00.000-07:00

Down Under - Further down! - Great Barrier Reef.

2008-05-06T02:59:00.000-07:00

3 Days live aboard on the great barrier reef. Completed my open water course.
No swimming pools for me thank you very much!

Damn, that's a big clam.

And to the right of this picture is a huge shark.

It looks better from below. Honest!

The boat.

Matt, my dive instructor. He's french. Bein Ashley, you didn't drown.

Down Under - The Cowboy way.

2008-05-02T20:39:00.000-07:00

giddy up.

Gonna mosey on down.

Bottle tree

A fiery horse with the speed of light, a cloud of dust, and a hearty 'Hi-ho Silver away!' Actually he was called 'Qantas' but never mind!

Move along now, you there at the back..keep up now!

heck, have you seen the new guy..He's one mean cowbow.

Prod, Prod...

Nein! meinem Kopf, ich bin dumm.

Nobody in 18 years has ever hit their head on that bar.

'Mind your head on the bar'..bang! Pay attention german girl!

Milky Milky click to understand Milk better.

Dinner guests

What the hell? Oz has some strange critters

Two bulls stood on a hill. They looked down on a valley where a dozen cows grazed. The young bull said, "Hey Pop, let's run down there and fuck one of those heifer." "No, Son," said the old bull. "Let's WALK down there and fuck ALL those heifers."

Down Under - Byron Bay

2008-04-22T17:29:00.000-07:00

Surf's up mate.

Down Under - Shelly the Spider!

2008-04-16T23:42:00.000-07:00

Shelly pants pretending to be a spider living under her house.

Down under - Lone Pine.

2008-04-15T23:50:00.000-07:00

Is'nt she cute? The Koala's not bad either

G'day

Little joey

I used to box for Cambridge don't you know!

Down Under - Brisbane -The Burbs

2008-04-11T18:24:00.000-07:00

Is it a croc? No silly, it's a treestump.

Ahhhhhhhh!

Down Under - Katarina's Place.

2008-04-11T18:20:00.000-07:00

Come in number 27.

Bigger than Roland's, but that's not hard is it! Ho Ho.

Down Under - Brisbane

2008-04-11T18:10:00.000-07:00

Big in Japan - G-Connah

2008-04-11T18:02:00.000-07:00

Massage Gel.

Where he lives should you want a rub down :)

Big in Japan - Mia Snack Bar

2008-04-11T17:37:00.000-07:00

yum.

Noooo, don't let him sing again!

He can't actually play! Just likes holding it. Too funny.

Hmm, tastes good.

Let's go to the Nasty House

Welcome to Japan.

Thanks Mia! It will make you eyes water :)

Big In Japan - Blowfish.

2008-04-11T17:28:00.000-07:00

Big in Japan - Itsukushima Shrine

2008-04-11T17:20:00.000-07:00

Anyone for Table Tennis?

Japan - Hiroshima Peace Memorial Museum

2008-04-11T16:59:00.000-07:00

Big in Japan - Kobe - Snack Bar

2008-04-11T16:38:00.000-07:00

Big in Japan - The Golden Pavilion Rokuon-Ji Temple

2008-04-10T18:10:00.000-07:00

Big in Japan - Kiyomizu Temple

2008-04-10T17:54:00.000-07:00

Big in Japan - Dinner time with the boys.

2008-04-10T17:39:00.000-07:00

Neil, Bossmans girl and the man himself.

Get you haircut son, new recruit for Bossman.

Chinese boys sporting Great Britain top.

The owners, who shut up shop shortly after we left as we had consumed all the food
they owned! Granddad is 82 btw!

Big in Japan - Todai-Ji Temple

2008-04-10T17:13:00.000-07:00

Big In Japan - Bar / Drink / Hangover / Solution

2008-04-09T18:54:00.000-07:00

Bar

Drink

Hangover

Solution

Big in Japan - Import / Export.

2008-04-09T18:49:00.000-07:00

Rabbit Wine tool Kit.

http://www.ocr-international.com/

Big in Japan - Kobe - Trainspotting.

2008-04-09T18:44:00.000-07:00

Doubt you would see these bad boys at Clapham Junction!

Big In Japan - Sign of the times.

2008-04-09T17:45:00.000-07:00

Big In Japan - Part 4 - Sculpture Corner.

2008-04-09T17:35:00.000-07:00

Saigō Takamori , last true Samurai.

The Gates of Hell.

Think about it.

It's all in the details.

Drain cover. Awesome.

Big In Japan - Part 3

2008-04-09T17:09:00.000-07:00